I always knew that 27 was going to be huge year in my life, the one where I would crystallize my future. I mean Van Gogh started painting at 27; Jim Morrison, Janice Joplin and Jimi Hendrix were all immortalized at 27. Here I am, about to end a year of self-discovery and let me tell you, I found my muse. I conquered 27 at I am officially about to conquer 28!
A Year Of 27:
- Loving myself
- Truly falling in love (again)
- Tripling my savings
- Traveling and working for one month in the US
- Paying off my car (part of my student’s loans)
- Finding myself
- Flying out to help someone move
- Becoming a Godmother for the first time
- Learning patience teaching people how to solve the GED practice tests
- Running a mile under 9 minutes
- Meeting and befriending incredible people
- Having the 3 best mentors anyone could ask for
- Launching my personal blog (this one!)
- Sustaining and excelling as the education consultant
- Experiencing Las Vegas fine dining
- VIP partying at a huge techno festival
- Re-discovering my love for writing
- Sewing my first duvet cover by hand
- Watching my first Cirque du Soleil show
- Learning and perfecting my conversational French
- Decorating my apartment
- Starting an amazing group helping young professional women
- Officially maturing
- Learning to be diplomatic and calm the spicy temper
- Believing in magic!
I made a grave mistake. I know it. The interesting thing is that I wouldn’t have know it unless I had the perspective to see it. So what does that tell us about mistakes? Are they worth it?
Well, one would argue that yes, in order to grow into a loving and compassionate human, we have to trip and fall. When you fall though, it hurts. You scrape your knee. You break an arm. You twist your ankle. Those are your ‘mistake battle wounds’. Here’s the interesting thing, though, they are all wounds and wounds heal.
So if a wound heals, does it make it less painful? No. Never. Nada. Niet. That is the other side of the mistake, it leaves a mark. With time, this mark will fade. The scariest part is not knowing how obvious the mark will be. Those questions are the ones that plague me right now. Will I be left with a mark the size of China?
I don’t know. I will never know perhaps. Only time can tell. So a mistake then is painful, leaves marks and is dictated by time. The only thing possible to do is to learn from the mistake and keep moving forward. No matter how difficult it is and will be.
I fell in love six years ago. I never realized the human capacity or maturity to love at such a young age. Here I am six years later and I learned that I have the capacity to love more deeply than ever. What started as a young romance, developed into a deep seeded love. I learned how to care, understand, accept, listen, get excited and be open in six years. On the one side, it’s amazing to know that I could do that. On the other hand, I question myself as to why I couldn’t do it better, sooner. What I never quite understood is how that 22 year old didn’t learn the lessons for a 28 year old love?
Is it simply that love has many faces and that part of loving is hurting as well? I don’t quite understand. I keep trying to wrap my head around it but at the end of the day, it’s not my head that needs to understand it, it’s my heart.
Love. It confuses me. It excites me. It scares me. Yet through all these emotions, I know the truth. I love! And I know how much I love him. No matter what comes, I love him. I do with all of my being. I keep coming back to this quote. It is incredible to know that in such few words, we can quantify the emotion of love. But really, love is not quantifiable by just words. It’s all encompassing.