YOU’RE NOT GOING TO BELIEVE ME, BUT IT HAPPENS EVERY YEAR.
Throughout the week of Halloween, our office becomes haunted. It used to just be small questionable events, like the lights flickering on and off, or the stapler running out of staples. Did a satanic ghost take all of the staples? Maybe, or maybe it was just your imagination. But this year was different….
I brought in donuts last Monday to kick off the week with a sugary boost of happiness. Of course, I don’t want to give my employees the idea that anything is free, so I charge $2 per donut. It works out to where I end up making money from the donuts since I picked them up super cheap before the bakery closed Friday night.
Everyone seemed to be enjoying them until one of our senior employees, Fred, began ranting on about how stale they looked and how he can’t afford to buy one. I probably should have ignored him, but this wasn’t the first time he gave me shit. So, instead, I said “It’s your sales numbers that are stale, Fred. Maybe if you had hit your quota last week, you could afford a donut.” Fred stormed off back to his desk, cursing under his breath.
About an hour later, I received an email from him. “You are unfair! Your head must be stuck far up your ass!” As I typed out my reply, my fingers felt like they were being pulled from key to key like a possessed Ouija board. I read it back to myself, and it said: “Watch it, Fred, or I’ll stick your head in the water cooler.“Perfect! I hit send and got back to work.