How much money would it take for you to sue your entire family? What if 100 million dollars was at stake? Would you sue your mother? Stop talking to your children? I know, it sounds absurd, but people do it. And I’m not sure if I should judge them until I’ve been in their shoes. Let me explain.
Wanting More Is Good
Tonight, I’d like to send you to a beautiful post I just read by a blogger named AnyMommy. The post is called the Space Between and in it, this wonderful writer talks about the gap between the mother she is and the mother she wants to be…which, like for many of us, can be pretty big.
The gap is certainly large for me. I wish I could tell you that I’m happy with the mother I am. But I can’t. I’m constantly thinking about how I should give my children more time, more attention, more patience, more guidance and even more love.
I wish I could tell you that I’m happy with the wife I am. But I can’t do that either. I know that I could be a lot more patient with my husband and not as demanding and yes, bossy (as my family constantly reminds me that I am! Thanks y’all).
I wish I could tell you that I’m happy with the sister, daughter, friend, neighbor…and dozens other things that I am to different people. But again…the answer is that I CAN’T.
But I don’t think it’s bad that I can’t. In fact, I’m thrilled (OK, thrilled might not be the perfect word but let’s go with it for now for dramatic effect) that I’m not happy with myself in terms of all these relationships and roles. I’m happy because I know that as long as I’m unhappy, I’ll be striving to be better. And that’s how I want to live my life.
It might sound crazy but striving to be better is one of the best things I have going for me. I’m not great at a lot of things but at least I’m constantly trying (with admittedly only periodic success) to be a better version of me.
And in the end, I think wanting a better version is a great start: wanting more of yourself, wanting more of others and wanting more from life. That is, as long as you know that success comes with the true effort to get more and not necessarily with “more” itself.